Greetings Great women of the universe and fellow keepers of the Golden Scrotum I would like to welcome you all to this eve of the New Year.
The prejudiced among you will ring out the old year like it is a festering beast wrought with all angst mayhem and bad egg McMuffins of the year. None of you will recall how you lauded the new year at the last Eve celebrations proclaiming 2014 as the start of a new age then (Republican-like) did all you could to impede progress. Like all new year resolves the glory fades into one of the millions of also rans.
Not this year though! This year, 2015, will be wrung in with great grandeur, gusto and gargantuan glory; we will have no choice but to follow baby year into new levels of achievement. This it Folks the beginning of the second age of enlightenment the moment when we can all be Wicks-like
Happy New Year People and spare a kind thought for 2014 it was not its fault we are a bunch of wankers.